If I knew i'd tell you.

Turned 19 btw. Didn't like it.

Anyway.

Yesterday I was never closer to completing my mission than ever before. So close I could touch it.

Just when I was totally in the clear, it was taken away from me. Temporarily? I doubt it. My goal is way too perfect for it to work out, that's the law of life.

Why bother? If the goal only gives me hope it'll work and at the same time crushes it.

Deep down, I don't think I'll win.

What do I do?

Persevere.

See, despite the fact I don't think I'll win, if I give up I'll never know if I actually would have ever won.

I'll soldier on until the end. I need to know that if I give it my best, I might win.

Who knows? Maybe it will actually work out?

Who am I kidding...